Life.Of.Sin

would you die for me if i asked you to?
would you bleed for me?
would you claw your skin with your nails
and bleed to death at my wish?

would you kill me if i asked you to?
would you slit my fucking wrists?
would you put a gun to my head
and pull the fucking trigger
if i begged you to help me end this?

would you kneel at my grave
and bring me black roses everyday
and find someone better to love you more
but still bring me black roses
and think of me despite my failure?

would you think of me as i was
or would you think of how you wish i was
how I should have been?

would you lie to me and call me pretty
tell me you wouldn’t ask for more?
would you look into my eyes and love me
despite me and all i am?

just pull the trigger
just call my name
and please remember to bring me
black roses everyday

Remember my quasi-stepdad?  Yeah…he’s getting divorced.  Apparently the bitch told him in an email that she moved to Scotland and wanted a divorce.

Just wanted to say that.

Luvverzz,
Mrs. Margera, aka Dru

I’m terrifed I have an undiscovered mental illness.  I think it may actually be a disease, the obsession I have with celebrities.  It’s like I can’t control it.

And the only way I get through the day is if I roleplay situations with them and myself in my head or out loud. 

And somedays I just wake up and I know that there’s someone else and I just have to learn all I can about ________.  It’s like a weird celebrity OCD or something.

And I asked my mom what you would do if you had a mental illness that they hadn’t discovered yet and of course she wanted to know why I asked, but I told her I wouldn’t tell her because she would worry.  And then today she said she was sooooo happy I wanted to get a job because it scared her when I got super obsessed with celebrities and all I wanted to do was write fanfiction and watch their shows and listen to their music…

I mean, she says that shit and then I just stare at her for a bit and walk out of the room and keep playing pool and she’s like ‘did I say something to make you mad’ and I said no, because she didn’t.  And about five minutes later she says ‘you sound mad’ and I told her I wasn’t mad.  And I had finished my pool game, so I went into the living room.

I mean, she says shit like that all the time.  Of course I’m not going to tell her about my fear of this celebrity OCD disease thing.

Plus, I’m not sure I would want to.  I completely don’t mind it most of the time…and like I said, I can only get through my day because of the roleplaying thing (I call them my dreamlovers).  I don’t know what would happen if I couldn’t do that.

………………………………………..

Luvverzz,
Mrs. Margera, aka Dru

So, I’m completely addicted to Bam Margera now.  I Tivo his show, all his specials, and Jackass.  I was looking for video clips the other day and I came across a page that said Bam Margera sex tape and all this other shit, but I just thought it was one of those fake things like ‘Nude Celebrity Pictures’ and shit, so I ignored it, but I came across the actual tape and I watched it.  Well, I clicked it and turned it off.  Then I went back and watched it because . . . how could I not?

And then today I was reading interviews with his ex-fiance who called a radio station and was saying he cheated on her with over 40 girls and one of them was Jessica Simpson, but . . . I don’t really care.  But she also said that he taped her without her permission.  And that is so wrong, but . . . I thought it was hilarious.

I found a site where you can listen to all his Sirius radio broadcasts and I clicked the most recent one and I was completely shocked by the language and shit, but I didn’t realize that’s apparently how guys normally talk. X_x

So . . . I’ve gotten a bit of a culture shock this week.

I also decided that Mikey Way is a complete ass.  And I hated his fiance because I thought she was a bitch and he was too good for her, but now I’m thinking they totally deserve each other.

Luvverzz,
Mrs. Margera, aka Dru