Lost in the raven-black night…behind the crimson door
You know the song “Dark Light” by H.I.M.? Well, if you don’t, you suck. Go illegally download it right now, or at least go here (http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B000ATT2QO/qid=1138581201/sr=2-1/ref=pd_bbs_b_2_1/104-2626612-6501540?s=music&v=glance&n=5174) and scroll down and listen to the 30 second preview of it, then go here (http://display.lyrics.astraweb.com:2000/display.cgi?him..dark_light..dark_light) and read the lyrics.
Also, you can go to their official site here (http://www.heartagram.com) and listen to three songs: Wings of a Butterfly, Behind the Crimson Door, and Under the Rose.
I am currently completely addicted to H.I.M. I got really really really depressed the other night so I had to go onto the iTunes music store and download ‘Dark Light’ with my mom’s credit card without telling her.
I was seriously getting to the point where I wanted to slit my wrists. I’ve been hiding pills in my dresser. I don’t know what I’m going to use them for or if I even will. I have 90 mg of Buspar, 150 mg of Lamictal, and 2 of my mom’s muscle relaxers. I think they’re called Metocarb, but I’m not sure and I don’t know how much they are. I also have some other pill that I don’t know what the hell it is…but it’s a pill. (I’m sure of that much.)
I haven’t gotten on messenger in awhile either. And I took a break from INO. I’m just taking a break from life. I really really wanted this job the other day so I could get money and stuff and maybe talk to people I’m not related to or that I meet online…but now I don’t want to leave the house again.
And I don’t want to talk to my mom about it. I don’t want to talk to her about anything of importance. I don’t want anyone to know. I don’t know why the hell I get so fucked up, but I hate people worrying about it. They have lives of their own. The last thing anyone needs right now is to worry about me.
So I just won’t let them find out.
I hate keeping secrets.
Luvverzz,
Mrs. Vam, aka Dru
You and me are a lot alike.
Please don’t kill yourself, Miss Dru. I don’t know you personally, but from what I know of you now, I think you’re awesome. There’s a lack of people are cool or as talented as you in this world and it would be a real shame to lose you.
I know this isn’t the most comforting thing, but life is a bitch. There are so many things that can and will go wrong, but you’ve got to try and keep your mind on the good things. I know that’s hard, and I can’t do it much either. Plus, no matter how hard life is, there is always someone who has it worse. (I’m not trying to call you selfish.)
I don’t talk to people about my problems at all, but people dump theirs on me and tell me that it helps them a lot. It doesn’t matter if you talk to your mother or not. Keeping a journal helps. I started a journal and I’ve come to depend on it, and I write in it almost religiously now. (Its an actual journal, not an online one, cuz I can take it anywhere.)
I really don’t know if I’m helping, but I am trying to, because I like you. You’re an awesome writer and just a spiffy person. I hope your life gets better.
You stupid!illegal download?FFFUCK!Insular man u are~!!!!
a) I’m not a man.
b) I didn’t illegally download the song. I purchased it off iTunes for 99 cents, thanks you very much.